Granted. only if u turn back your clock or watch..

I wish to celebrate chinese new year with my family...

Granted. You must now spend the rest of your life turning back clocks and watches.

I wish that I didn't have to repeat myself.

Wish granted: reverting the time you spent back to now... hmm, right back where you started.

I wish to have a pure, uncorruptable wish.

Granted. The only thing you can wish is to live for a few more seconds after you make your wish. There's no guarantee how long it will last, though.

I wish that I could work up enough nerve to woo the person I like.

Granted, but the person you like likes someone else and doesn't even know you exist.
I wish I could stop lying to everyone.

Granted. You now speak only truth, which angers those who want you to lie for them.

I wish that I could find something funny.

granted...you look in the mirror and start laughing like crazy...

I wish my fear of boys will disappear

Wish granted-now, you're afraid of mint tea, with no explainable reason.

I wish my fear of new things (like going to someplace unfamiliar, or meeting new people) would disperse.

granted...now you fear everything that is familiar to you(including computers, pillows, food, water, your family...you'll die of starvation in the end)

(I don't like mint tea to begin with...I like mint sweets...hehe)

I wish some one would advice me on which college to go to and what course I should take after I get my results...

Granted. You are ultimately convinced into taking classes at the worst college in the world.

I wish that my neck would stop hurting.

granted...now your neck doesn't hurt but the rest of your body hurts...

I wish I had tons of money without having to work

Too easy. You get your money from the life insurance on your closest relative. They die as a result.

I wish that people would realize that life is not that easy.

granted.And now all tohse with weak minds get really depressed because they now know life is not easy and commit suicide...

I wish that everyone on this planet can live happily

Granted. Everyone dies the moment they experience happiness.

I wish that cyborgs were real.

granted.Now cyborgs rule the planet.

I wish that I had supernatural powers

Granted. Only to find out you are not the only one.

I wish Parents will stop misunderstanding their Children.

(I don't mind that I'm not the only one...in fact I prefer it...Thanks genie!)

granted now the children will misunderstand their parents...which kind of happens a lot anyway...

I wish that I knew martial arts

Granted...you knew martial arts but then accidently you tripped over a dead dog and your leg became numb ever since so you can't perform martial arts

I wish that I past my exams

Granted, you passed your elementary school exams and due to the fact it's just a pass, you are retained in kindergarten for a few more years. This will only end when you finally break out of "just passing".

I wish I could live past 100, with the youth and vigour of a 16 year old.

Granted. You are now a cockroach. (some researchers say that they will outlive the human race, and even the world's end)

I wish that people weren't so afraid of bugs.

Wish granted, though, since you failed to specify between the animals or car, now, everyone's afraid of a form of transportation.

I wish I could figure out what's wrong with me.

granted...everything is wrong with you...lol

I wish that I was perfect

Granted. But now you also have a misconection between the neurons where your memory works and those that control your blade's sphincter. Now, every time you remember something, you pee in your pants, and have to use a diaper.

Now I wish Jennifer Lopez to love me...
Or Cameron Diaz. Or Beyonce...

granted.now all 3 love you and constantly fight over you until they pull you apart

I wish that my work wasn't so boring