Disasterpiece

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tecnophreak

tecnophreak

retired user

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well, heres a poem i made. I've felt the need lately, but i'm not really the poeteic type, so be gentle. I hope you can realize whats ogin on thru the words. (sighs) here goes:

noone to talk to
a fact, rather blue.

feelings better spent
inside, as a closed vent.

sometimes they seep out
and what you find out,
is that noone cares,
and noone shares.

the one you love
you feel like you shove into
a feeling you've been through
many times past.

and will it last?
or fade like before

you feel it with your core,
you speak out your feelings
you feel the room reeling

at square one again,
shes gone like the wind
does truth always hurt this much?
lord, i can't bear this, I have a hunch.

to love and lose, or lie in torment?
this thing called life, fells like a hornet

cry as you beat on your shins
you'll never really live again
a piece of yourself lost,
a piece better tossed.

for that one lost love....
that graceful, beautiful dove

(copyright tecnophreak 2005)


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  • Feb 08, 2005

SilentMasamune

SilentMasamune

I'm all washed up. . .

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I think it's really touching. It sounds as if something or someone dear to you was lost. I wonder what or who...

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  • Feb 08, 2005

ultimashower

ultimashower

Reppin' The Nice Guys

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Not bad at all... Would've helped a little if there was some sort of form to the stanzas! ^_^' But overall, it gets some emotion accross, and that's the point right? If artists stuck to rules (which I myself tend not to...) then there wouldn't be any innovation, right? Good job, practice with more. ;)

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  • Feb 08, 2005

DernierCri

DernierCri

identity mayhem

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that is really nice man... really nice
i hope it was driven by real feeling that you experienced

tecnophreak

tecnophreak

retired user

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sadly, yes... .

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  • Feb 08, 2005

AngelKate

AngelKate

~*Lady Sweetness*~

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awwww! :( That's so sad but its also really good. I like to write poetry too. :)

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OracleAngel

Retired Moderator

OracleAngel

-... de lovbot-

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Hehehe they should have a new forum where you can write poems like that but yeah deep feelings run deep in this poem...to heal thyself is to accept it and in the end wait for another dove to fly back into the window....

Life aint that all torment because ive learned that from experience, Love comes in many forms, faces and numbers and from the multitude there is only one which you would pick....
Hang in there man!

PM me if you wanna talk... i like to help people! :)

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