For the Nice Guys

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Mordin

Mordin

The Wise One

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After some good talk with Cy, I wanted to make a thread that is just for the nice guys. Now this is going to be my rant so pardon me if I generalize my point and sound really ignorant. :)

Here it goes: Guys we have suffer a lot through the years, and we get no love at all. The MT girls are pretty cool about nice guys, but in our offline world things aren't so nice for some of us. It is hard to be a nice guy when so many things go against us, because we don't stand out. We don't get reward for our kindness or generosity. I am getting tired of seeing nice guys finishing last.

I know this one guy, handsome looking fellow if you are a girl, he has a reputation with the ladies, because somehow the ladies couldn't resist him. He is a real sleazebag to me personally, because he dupes the girls into thinking he likes them, and he turns around leaves them when he got what he wanted from them. The girls gets heart borken, and this creep keeps luring the girls into his trap. I can't understand at all, of course the fact this creep has an outgoing personality and is very smooth talker helps his cause a lot. But this just makes me mad, are girls this dumb to fall for such lousy guy who is just a pretender. :angry:

There are a lot nice guys out there that just gets overlook because they couldn't be charismatic, but it doesn't mean they should be look over by the ladies compare to the guys that are smooth. Just because we don't have the right line doesn't mean we aren't good enough for some of you girls. :)

Now rant over, bash me if you like, or support my props to the nice guys, either way i am happy to get this out. :D

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Thank you einna for the siggy :)

  • Feb 25, 2005

CyanideBlizzard

Retired Moderator

CyanideBlizzard

Margarita Time!

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Its a sad truth of life and its really pathetic too. Just because they nice guy isn't always the most popular one or has the best body doesn't mean hes not attractive or a great person to be with, but sadly its true.

To be honest I'd like to quote something that I was given by a friend not too long ago that I think is a very solid truth.

Note : If anyone finds this offensive, please PM me and I'll edit this.

Quote by News article submitted to Geek Love RadioFrom what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as "oh, he's too nice to date" or "he would be a good boyfriend but he's not for me" or "he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn't possibly ask him out!" or the most frustrating of all: "no, it would ruin our friendship." Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can't figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I'm going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn't last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single

The whole article can be found at..
http://www.geekloveradio.com/?glr=odetoniceguys


Its really sad because that article is a truth to the point of where I literally could cry. Its that sad. Though this isn't saying that this applies to all girls. It has been stated before and I can prove for a fact (because I'm with a wonderful girl myself) that all girls aren't like this and in fact can be proven that nice girls can finish last too. Just that nice guys seem to get the short end of the far too often, but we all get the short end of the stick, though I personally disagree with what the main factor of the story is sex. I'd stray from that myself. After all, were not nice just to get in your pants. Were nice because thats who we are, nothing more or nothing less.

*raises a glass* I give a toast to all you gents out there who hold the door open for ladies, who know your manners and who can be yourself while doing so. Be proud of who you are, because you really should be. Keep on being nice because someday it will pay off. This toast also applies to you ladies as well, I'm not excluding you from anything. I toast to the nice guys and girls out there, cheers.

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  • Feb 25, 2005
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*clinks glasses with CyanideBlizzard* Indeed... to nice guys. *gulps down*

I suppose there's no challenge in courting nice guys.

DarkChronos

DarkChronos

The Wicked One This Way Comes

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you're right, man use to suffer very much with love but that has a solution... DONT FALL IN LOVE WHEN YOU HAVE A GIRL AS A friend, never think THAT THE girl, WHEN talks TO YOU, HANG OUT WITH YOU, treat YOU GOOD OR anything else, HAS A direct relation THAT means THE GIRL WANT something TO YOU beyond friendship, forget that, GET THAT IDEA OUT OF YOUR head, girls (at least where i live) use to treat themselves, way better then man do with other men, that's why some times when girls grab your hand, give you a kiss in the cheek, plays with you(in the correct way of the word), give you a hug, doesn't mean that they are in love you, they in fact like you but as a friend and that's the way they show you that.

the guy you mention, that kind of guy doens worth even mention them. i have a good reputation with girls too, but i have earned that not by being the sexiest gut in this planet (in fact i'm just an average with a big stomach xD, at www.fotolog.net/Weapon_X are pics of me) i earned it being friend of girls, when i meet a girl i just talk to her, doing no sexy, gentleman, or any kind of tactics i'm just me, i use my own vocabulary, i joke my way, nothing spectacular, is she likes it, that's ok, if she doesn't that's ok too, is imposible to be liked by everyone. if girls like guys like the one you describe, that's maybe a sadomasochist behavior of them xD

I hope this will be useful to you and maybe others ;)

  • Feb 25, 2005

Keough

Keough

Lockhart

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-EDIT-
Saw MechR do this OX *Clink glass with Cy* Oh Lay!

Oww wow a thread for the nice guys [Ponders] 'Wonder if i fall into this category lol. OX i must say it is tru. Good guys finishes last. Or so it seems? lol Well you do pull an interesting point Mordin. But i do believe we do stand out tho. I mean every good deed comes with a little prize rite? Even if its a lil "thnkx" or just a big smile i believe even if we dont stand out we will one day be remember for our good deed. But here's a lil advice u could do Mordin. This person/guy you speak of you say he's a total Ass rite? XD now if i was in this situation a simple thing to do is warn the gurl he is tryin go to get say something around the 'He's not a good person' or 'Watch out cause he has a bad rep' let the gurl kno ahead of time so she'll eventually be ready and if she doesnt believe ya then let life takes course and evenutally she'll soon see the real him ^^. Lol now i'm wondering if i'm even talking about this topic XD Ja.

DarkChronos

DarkChronos

The Wicked One This Way Comes

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"Good guys finishes last" that's A BIG FAT LIE! i consider myself as a good guy, but you have to be smart, DONT FALL IN LOVE IS THE KEY TO SURVIVE(or avoid) LOVE sickness, a well grown friendship last longer than anything, maybe you may not find the love of your life but surely you will get people who loves you that way, and that's to my more important than have girlfriend who(maybe) will be by your side a few weeks or a few moths and the story is over :S

friendship rules guys

  • Feb 25, 2005

SilentMasamune

SilentMasamune

I'm all washed up. . .

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Mordin, you know that I fit this category because we talked prior to the creation of this thread.

Of course I would like to be with a girl because I am ready for a relationship. I'm ready for the consequences of a bad relationship as well. I see so many other guys around the girls, but in my case, none of the girls are around me. They know that I'm a nice guy, but they don't see what is inside of me. They don't see that I'm looking for someone; maybe my aloneness is clue that I'm looking for someone.

A lot of the guys I know are wannabes, and they are attracted by girls because they meet the interests of other girls. I, for one, am different from most of the other guys. I go to college for my education. That's why my grades are As and Bs, and many of the other guys' grades are Ds and Fs because they would rather go on dates with the girls. Girls would probably spend more time with a guy who spends more time outside than inside. It might be a limitation for me, but I have to wait and see. Until then, my opinion about girls and many other guys will not change.

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  • Feb 25, 2005
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first off i'd like to say, i would love to find a girl who likes me for who i am. just as i am sure there are many girls out there thinking the same thing. about guys, that is. mostly.
anyway, i think that nice guys (which i hopefully am) are pretty much doomed (which i hope i am not). why girls seem to like guys that treat them like **** is beyond me, but it seems like they do. being the nice guy seems to make girls feel like they have someone to fall back on. if they need to complain about their b/f, they can talk to you. if the guy they're dating dumps them, they can go to you for comfort. if they know you are interested in them, and you are a nice guy, they figure you'll wait for them, giving them the chance to play the field. subconsciously they'll believe they can always fall back on you if they don't find someone else.
honestly i'm pretty sure the world will rarely ever reward the nice guys. if good was always rewarded and evil was always punished, then everyone would always do the right thing. since people have learned to make different choices, the world obviously doesn't work that way. people should try to be good to others, and unfortunately they should probably expect to get shafted for it.

  • Feb 25, 2005

winterlilac09

winterlilac09

white freed by her savior~

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Hey, guyz. If you don't mind a girl's view on this, I'll be adding my two cents to this thread as well~

First things first, I can completely agree with you guys that it seems to be that the nicest guys always finish last. I've seen a ton of guys in my school who are fantastic people who really are gentlemen who will open a door for you and help you pick up a book that you accidentally dropped. And believe me, I'd be happy to give all those guys a chance if only not for the simply amazing guy that I have and hold dear to my heart now. I can honestly say I wish the best for those guys and the guys here on MT who are in similar situations.

I'll admit, truthfully and shamefully, to the reason why these guys always do finish last and that's because most girls now are , in fact, bitches. I'll say that without any sympathy to anyone of my gender and I can also honestly say, screw the female population for not even considering giving these wonderful guys a chance. Girls now are so completely shallow, it's pathetic. In middle school, you will see girls walking around dressed like sluts and groveling at any guy who looks "hot." Either that, or they toy with as many guys as they can until the guys realize that they are being toyed with. It's pathetic to watch and it really pains me to be a girl as so many of my sex will sink down to that level.

Additionally, even if there are some jerks out there who are more outgoing than the sweet and shy caring guys, that gives a girl absolutely no right to fawn over him instead. Please, I still cannot see how and why girls will go for a guy with money even though he treats her like fucking dirt.

It's horrible and I wish I could say I could feel for all you guys out there who deserve a girl but are single because of this. I know all fo you guys will find someone special eventually, because if even one of you guys don't then this world truly is much too cruel and unjust.

f a l l i n g . i n t o . s w e e t . c e l e s t i a l . d r e a m
l i g h t . i n . s h e e r . a n d . s i m p l e . s l e e p

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  • Feb 25, 2005
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This is war, I tell you, war!! >=0000000~~~~~!!!!!!!! XD

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I think one of the main reasons nice guys get overlooked is because they tend to be too shy to even make a move or be forward. From my experience and from what I've seen, girls tend to like guys that are more straight forward and confident. (an asshole type guy is more likely to have those qualities.. though usually a bit to the extreme.)

I'm with one of those nice guys at the moment though. Eh.. I'm his first girlfriend and he's 19. My advice to nice guys is to be more confident and straight forward. ;0 You'll eventually find someone. Most nice guys I used to know were always taken. :P

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lol mordin did you dedicate a thread just for me XD

haha well lets see...your basically right i guess with all of that stuff but for me i don't be kind and a gentlemen and expect stuff in return, i do it because thats just me...if i girl acts like that and doesn't want a nice guy then i don't want her...lots of fishes in the sea and ill just take a nice girl fishing with me XD but yea i get turned down alot with those lines...haha oh well i rather have friendship forever than love in those cases...much less troublesome

o_O-0
weeeeeeeee

  • Feb 25, 2005

Celessa

Retired Moderator

Celessa

Okaerinasai - Welcome Home

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I'm more apparently fond of people who are good friends than lovers. To the nice guys? Hmm - well I haven't been around much people like those lately in real life - but when you do see someone as considered a good friend of mine, I wouldn't want to lose them quite easily, boy or girl. Mostly my friends are girls. But there are nice guys out there - I hate to admit, very very rare to find - those are the very few friends I have who are actually guys.

Maybe 2 or 3. That's about it - in the batch of like hundreds of girls who are my friends out there. lol - And yes, I also hate it when a girl shamelessly uses her beauty to allure men and take advantage of them by telling them what they can and can't do, then dispose of them. That's not like me either. I oppose of it.

Some girls are really snotty people - some are down to earth as well. Guys don't have much to go upon unless they have extremely good looks. Girls get looked more after than guys and are generally more preferred, of course. So yeah, sorry to hear for the good guys out there.

**Chugs root beer** Mordin, you are one of them, like I said, ne? Take care. **Bows**

"No matter where you go, no matter how tough life may be, just remember that always in your heart, you will still be loved."

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MadWiz

MadWiz

Student Slacker

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o.o really a serious thread again..

I guess I can't consider muself a good guy.. I don't look really good.. not too socialable though pretty honest :X .. and kinda perverted o.o bad effects of the internet!! =p

Its true many good guys are overlooked.. and same with the girls..
I think pretenders etc do get to see their suffer in the future..
its kinda hard for me to say but I would let things happen as time goes
the goood guys and girls would eventually, for more than half of them I guess, get taken.. and those that really choose them would be the smart ones you see~ if you just want those that like looks and character to choose you initially instead of others.. they would in the end probably change their mind and give up on you too.. you just end up suffering for who does not deserve you~

hmm I might be a bit messy with what I say but my message is I believe we will get something that we will not regret in the end~ ^^

  • Feb 25, 2005

DarkMaiden1369

DarkMaiden1369

.::Hopeless::.

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Quote by MadWizo.o really a serious thread again..
I guess I can't consider muself a good guy.. I don't look really good..
not too socialable though pretty honest :X .. and kinda perverted o.o
bad effects of the internet!! =p


lol Well don't wory most guys are perverts ok let me rephrase that all guys are perverts:nya: lol I can think of a few here on MT
lol but I wont say who even though you know who u are :nya: lmao but anyway,
nice guys to me finish last because girls take advantage of them ^_^' I mean sometimes
you cant always be nice and some nice guys are so quiet and wont make a move, i know if
a guy doesnt make a move on me I sure as hell wont lol but I do feel bad for you guys who
get screwed all the time but there is not sense in whining about it lol ^_^' lol Mordin you're such a whiner but I guess I still like you lmao

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You shattered all the hopes and dreams I never had.....

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*chink* I've been feeling this experience for many years. *sip* A big problem I've faced time and again is how I give my all, go out of my way, to make girls happy, not looking for more than friendship perhaps, and then I'm forgotten forever once she feels better. It's not a very good feeling.. I can stand unrecognition but it makes me feel pretty bad when it's as if I don't exist after putting so much effort into someone's feelings.

*sip* It really is quite true along with other countless human faults (male and female equally), that today gentlemen finish last most of the time. One of my friends who claims himself a "player" says some crazy things to girls, just outright disrespectful or practically begging for sex, and I see them have their little smiles being taken in to whatever charm disrespect holds. If that's what I have to do, I give up; *finishing gulp* but then again perhaps I don't want to be interested in a girl prone to that in the first place, lol.

I'm somewhat certain that everyone will have someone if they keep themselves open and can see them. The problems that probably happen between relationships won with things like straight looks or charm are problems I should probably be glad I don't have. So in the end, maybe we don't finish as low a rank as we think. But then again, who knows. *refill please.*

Mordin, great thread, and don't worry; when you're actually a nice guy, you surely won't get bashed =)

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"Eloi, Eloi, lema... sabachthani..."

  • Feb 25, 2005

Dragus

Dragus

DarkDragonKnight

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I was raised to treat women with respect and i am a nice guy just stay the course. From what i have learned is keep being nice and u will get the girl, yea u might get turned down but u might be surprised to c the girl who wants to be with u is more beautiful than the one that turned u down so just chill. U might want to tell the ex u are seeing her sister after u and her broke up because if she finds out another way it can get ugly i kid u not, is that some kind of unwritten rule or something.

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-DragonKnight of the Flame Kingdom-

Shiz

Harmless Ronin

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dont know about nice or bad guys out there...all i know is they are annoying guys, 'shy' guys and straightforward guys and mostly don't really hurt you...love can come later i dont wanna make the wrong decision too fast and i've come across quite some girls that likes to 'play' guys feelings with love so bad girls and bad guys are pretty even to me

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  • Feb 25, 2005

Scarlet

Scarlet

Wouldn't you wanna know?

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Quote by MordinThere are a lot nice guys out there that just gets overlook because they couldn't be charismatic, but it doesn't mean they should be look over by the ladies compare to the guys that are smooth. Just because we don't have the right line doesn't mean we aren't good enough for some of you girls. :)

True. Very true, Mordin. Being a girl, I get lots of that kind of crap from the female species around me.

For example, there's that guy in my class who takes salsa classes with me. He's the only guy dancing. And guess what..? Not only do the other guys look at him weird, but the girls also find him not good enough! And he must be one of the nicest guys I ever met!!! You know the like: caring, attentionate, hard-working...

And that just frustrates me. Okay, to be completely honest, I might be a bit picky about guys sometimes (huh... that should explain my lack of relationships which sums up to practically zero), but I'm not the kind of girl to enjoy being cruel to guys. Because, come on, there's not only boyfriend/girlfriend side to a girl/guy relationship. You can also be friends.

But also, as a far-from-perfect human being, I have to admit that sometimes the flirty bad boy type is very attractive. That's why nice guys get overlooked sometimes... Which kind of sucks, if you ask me.

Anyway. I'll stop my babbling now. Thanks for this thread...

--Scarlet

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hmz...interesting thread.....
well...there is a point...some guys just can't get girls because of their look, attitudes and alot of things.....but he is darn nice and carefull about everyone and everything....but mayB the guy dun wan love or so.......if he wants......I think he should be patient.....there are so many girls in the world.....there is always one for you .....(okay...the world....it's far...)

I'm reading a book, it's called: the technique for beeing a human(it's in chinese).....well...it talked about the attitude and the way he or she is......can be just the outside of him her........he/she create a personality that will give their the most advantage...so....mayB he/she isn't like that.....even at home.....you'll never know....it's like that a person dun have a real original personality(mayb there is....but it's rare). mayB you say....."I always try to beeing myself"....but mayB that's just a side of you....and you didn't noticed it.......so...personality is a cmplex thing....and you can be fooled really fast on this world...

well...back about this thread.....if you are really nice and keep things really simple and so......but you dun have a girlfriend and you wan one........2 options:
1. search and have patient.......
2. a bit difficult.....change yourself.....try more variation......mayb it will help =)

gemini4life

gemini4life

The Quiet Geezer

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*raises glass of water* don't like to drink much part of being a nice guy XP .

Finally a thread about the nice guy, and how tough it's being a nice guy. I feel the pain of all you guys, but guess instead of rant I'd like to talk about the good things about being a nice guy.

Sure it's tough to find that one girl that can truly appreciate you for who you are and wants to be more then friends, but I’m sure you all know how rewarding it can be to be a nice guy. I'm 23 going on 24 this March 22nd, and during these years I've met some truly wonderful people that I would not have had a chance to if I wasn't the way I was.

I think being nice means you open yourself a little more and you see world a little more. I think it comforts people to be around someone who isn't hiding behind some veil of secrecy or not putting on a show around you. Once you have the type of relationship going just a simple smile or thank you from those individuals means so much more, because you know you've done something nice for someone you care about. It's a tough/impossible feeling to describe but I'm sure you guys know what I mean.

Finally to the ladies, here's what I think and experienced too. Because we are being nice, you worry about hurting us or risking the friendship when we do approach you and say we'd like to be more then just friends. I really hope you understand that we are not like those other guys who can simply go ask for a date, it takes a great deal of courage to do so, and it gets harder and harder with each rejection. It's really sad when we start to think like what DarkCronos said and just give up on Love completely. I've thought about that too and come real close, but I'm lucky I've got some really close female friends who have talked it out with me, and we have a mutual understanding of what the other feels.

Well there's my little bit, best of luck to you great nice guys, and hang in there. As for the ladies, next time you meet a "nice" guy think about what we've said here.

It's not that I have better vision
It's that I open my heart to that which others turn a blind eye to

  • Feb 25, 2005

Holt

Holt

pffft

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You really hit the spot with this thread mordin. I wonder, are there any, loud, obnoxious, yet inexpicably popular guys on these forums?

It's a universal constant though. Especially at the age around secondary school (age range 11-18) and possibly even further until you grow up enough to actually care about your future.
But I don't think any nice people should change themselves. This world really needs quiet, subtley nice people who are kind for nothing in return. If you're a nice guy (I hope this includes me ^_^), please don't change yourself, I hope I can meet you some day.

For us people, all we can do is wait and hope. Just work hard to make your life better, do good to others and eventually good things will happen to you if not already happening.

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skysong

skysong

~SMS~

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*humbly bows to all nice guys*
This is such a sad thing, so many nice people being treated unfairly! I have to agree that girls can be, well, witches...sigh....and unfortunatly, many girls will not be changing their attitudes any time soon. Girls like these I tend to ignore as much as humanly possible, and my best friends are in no way like them. I hate girls who go through boyfriends like crackers, taking any free jerk they can find, just to brag to others they they have a boyfriend. grrrr, sorry, bad experience with someone like this...

Please guys, don't get discouraged. There are girls who will appreciate your kindness. I know I do :) I am thankful for all of the nice guys that I have met here, and it makes me so sad that you are having such problems... T_T

The world needs kind people lilke you, so please don't give up your kindness ever! Fight on guys!! (sorry that was really corny XD )

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  • Feb 25, 2005

XavierCrow

From Angel to Vigilante

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Whatever it is you're drinking, I'll have some please... *raises a glass* It's not just with women that nice guys get the end of the stick... *gulp* aahh, it seems to be in every day life aswell. I think some poeple think of this world as a race or war. In a race, you can't slow down to let others in front of you... being nice won't help you... and in a war, you can't drive a sword through someone, then apologise! Or even worse, let them stab you first! But what people don't see is that eventually the race ends and the fame fades, those who ruthlessly ran are left far from home. Sorry for the metaphore, but it's how I talk! XP What I think is that most girls eventually grow up... they say that girls are four years more mature than guys... but I think that should be re-studied. It's hard for nice guys to stay nice when they're constantly being pushed out of the way by the ruthless and ignored by our closest, but I assure you... stay calm and we will win the longer race. :)

In the end, all there is, is what exists and what we believe or perceive is true... and there's no distinctions between the two.
- Myself

  • Feb 25, 2005

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