People have wanted to kill me for this one.
The Legend of the Great Ape
One day a Photographer learned of a legendary Great Ape, people would come from miles to see this creature. The
Photographer sent out messages hopeing some one would tell him where to find this Great Ape. Day after day, the
photographer waited and waited. Paitiently he hoped some one would tell him where he could find this Great Ape. The days
turned to weeks and week to months before a wildlife expert contacted the Photographer, this expert knew of the Great
Ape and would take the Photographer to see it. But there was an important ground rule. "You must never touch the
Great Ape." The Photographer was confused but understood and agreed.
So the next day they set out by car traveling over land going south. 20 miles, 40 miles, 80 miles, 160 miles, 320 miles.
Endless hours were spent just driveing along, they had to stop for gas at this point. At the gas station the Attendant
pumped the gas saying "We don't git too many people out here in these parts. Where are you fellows
heading?" The Wildlife Expert said "I am taking him to see the Great Ape." The Attendant looked
concerned, and in a worried voice asked "You did tell him not to touch the Great Ape right?" The Wildlife
Expert calmly replied, "Yes I told him, and don't worry I'll be there to see that he
doesn't."
Back into the car the Wildlife Expert and Photographer continued the trip. 1 hour seemed like 2, time just creeped by
slowly. The drove through a desert, out of range of any radio stations to entertain themselves. 2 hours, 4 hours, 8
hours, it seemed like an endless journey, they would take turns driving at this point with the Wildlife Expert giving
directions. It was a very long trip, until the desert turned into fields of grass and eventually the came upon a jungle.
Surely the Photographer thought this is near where the Great Ape lived. They drove into near the jungle to a village,
the Villagers all gathered around to see who the visiters to their humble home was. They knew the Wildlife Expert but
the Photographer was a stranger to them.
The village chief welcomed the Wildlife Expert as an old friend, was wondered what biusness has brought him back here?
The Wildlife Expert explained that his friend here the Photographer was interested in getting a picture of the Great
Ape. After hearing that the Village Chief got very serious, looked at the Photographer and said "Be careful, and no
matter what you do. Don't ever touch the Great Ape. Understand?". The Photographer feeling a little put off by
the Village Chief's tone of voice replied "Yes, I understand. I must never touch the Great Ape." They all
went to sleep for the night.
The next day bright and early the Wildlife Expert led the Photographer and a few other into the jungle. He told them to
bring plenty of water and something to eat as it's a 40 mile walk to the Great Ape's lair. So they set off,
there was no trail to follow they had to hack their way through the jungle. The Wildlife Expert took the lead, keeping
his eyes on the look out for dangers like giant snakes, lions, tigers or crocodiles. Fearlessly they trekked on and
didn't see so much as a few mosquitos that kept harassing them the whole walk. Hacking and chopping their way
through the jungle the Wildlife Expert pointed out to the Photographer "That right there is our destination, that
mountain". It was a good 12 hours away, but some how they got there and set up camp.
It was then the Wildlife Expert told the Photographer, "The Great Ape is at the top of this mountian, we'll
have to climb it. Now remember don't touch the Great Ape." The Photographer made it clear he remembered that
fact and began his climb up the mountain. "How far up are we going?" the Photographer asked. About 1500 feet
Wildlife Expert confermed, a daunting task. It was about sundown by the time the reached the summit. The Wildlife Expert
then told the Photographer "The Great Ape is in a cave just around that corner there. Go get your picture now, but
remember don't touch the Great Ape."
The Photographer slowly moved around the mountain's edge and spotted a cave with metal bars at it's entrance.
This is it! He thought to himself, all he needs is one good picture. He walked up the bars and looked inside. Just then
the Great Ape lunged at him, but was blocked by the bars. Terrified the Photographer quickly stepped back and started
wildly takeing as many photos has he could in his paniced state. Back he went to the Wildlife Expert who asked,
"Did you get your picture?" Relived the Photographer said, "Yes, yes I got it.". Then the Wildlife
Expert asked "Did you touch him?". Suprised by this question the Photographer responded no.
So the task completed the group climbed back down the mountain. This was a much easier trip this time, but the jungle
had grown back so once again they had to hack their way through the jungle. 40 miles walking again the next day. All the
way through the jungle they went and after the 40 miles they returned to the village. The villagers gathered around,
these were both friends now. The Village Chief please they were both alright looked at the Photographer and asked,
"Did you touch the Great Ape?". "No." answered the Photographer, "I got my pictures, but did
not touch the Great Ape.". Please by this the village had a feast that night. And the next day the Photographer and
Wildlife Expert got in their car and went back into the desert.
Driving the endless hours through wide open spaces of sand and rocks for miles and miles. Hours and hours went by until
they got to the gas station to refuel. The Attendant remember them, how could he forget. The Attendant asked the
Photographer "So did ya git you're pictures?". Pleased with himself the Photographer said "Yes, I
got a few of them." Then the Attendant asked "Ya didn't touch the Great Ape, did ya?" Tired of this
comment the Photographer said dryly "No, I already know, don't ever touch the Great Ape." The Attendant
happy with that filled their tank, and wished them a good day.
Heading back north, back home to the big city. The distance was great but the Photographer could not wait to get home
and develop the pictures he had taken. Though he had paniced, some of the pictures had to be good ones. 20 miles, 40
miles, 80 miles, 160 miles, 320 miles. Endless hours were spent just driveing along. They entered the city, the
Photographer said good bye and thank the Wildlife Expert for his help. That night the Photographer developed his
pictures, they all turned out great. Not a problem with them, the Photographer went to bed but he was not completely
satisfied. It kept bugging him. Why is no one to touch the Great Ape?
The question bothered him so much the next day he got into his car and drove back the distance. 20 miles, 40 miles, 80
miles, 160 miles, 320 miles. Endless hours were spent just driveing along, they had to stop for gas at this point. At
the gas station the Attendant saw the Photographer return and had to know "What brings you back to these
parts?" Quickly thinking of an excuse the Photographer lied, "Those pictures didn't turn out that good,
I'm going back for more." The Attendant understood, people can make mistakes even professionals, but the
Attendant had to remind him, "Well ok, but don't touch that Great Ape." Agitated the Photographer snapped
back Yeah yeah yeah, I know that already.".
Into his car went the Photographer driving fast as he wanted to get this over with. The trip still felt like it was
takeing just as long no matter how much faster he drove. For miles and miles, hour after hour this trip just felt longer
by himself this time. The desert seemed to be endless, even at 80 mph. After 6 hours of driving the Photographer came
upon the village. The Villagers remember him still, the Village Chief welcomed him back after such a short time. But the
Village Chief was wondering just what had brought the Photographer back here. The Photographer told them the same thing
he told the Gas Station Attendant a few hours ago, "I need some more pictures, the ones I took weren't any
good."
The Village Chief with great concern said, "I understand, I will send some one to guide you, but remember DO NOT
touch THE great ape.". The Photographer has just about heard this enough, "I know I'm not to touch the
Great Ape, Don't have a heart attack over this." The Photographer insisted he did not need and help this time
and knew the way. So he set off into the jungle alone, hacking away through the 40 miles to the cave of the Great Ape.
He beleive he knew the land and how to deal with the wild life. He didn't need any one for it this time. Through
the jungle and over the river to the mountain. Then he climbed that mountain, up 1500 feet to the summit.
He then crept around the corner, and saw the Great Ape sleeping against the bars on it's cave. The Photographer saw
this as the perfect opprotunity and took it! Quitely he moved up the mouth of the cave and very softly tapped the Great
Ape on the shoulder like a feather.
Suddenly the Great Ape awoke, howling, and looked right at the Photographer. Then the Great Ape tore the bars from the
front of the cave and came at him. In a move a complete terror the Photographer ran from the mouth of the cave and
around the corner, looked back and saw the Great Ape was right behind him. In a bigger panic this time than last he
started climbing down the mountian, but in his hurried state was not being careful. His foot slipped and the
Photographer began tumbleing, head over heels, rolling down the mountian. He could have sworn he hit every rock on the
way down. Tumbling over every rock, brush and outcrop on the side of the mountian untill he hit bottom.
Awaking from his spill, he was amazed to see he was alive, mabye a little bruised but more or less intact and ok. He
looked up the mountian and saw a little shape coming down the mountian, he knew it was the Great Ape. Scared even more
he left every thing behind and ran of into the jungle. He was in far to much of a hurry to hack a trail now. As far as
he was running, he'd doubt any kind of wild beast could catch him. Through the jungle he ran until he returned to
the village.
The Villagers saw the Photographer and notice he was bruised and his clothes looked ripped. The Village Chief looked at
the Photographer and asked "What has happend to you?" Then looking into the trail the Photographer had left in
the jungle, the Village Chief saw a a little shape getting bigger and closer. In horror the Village Chief yelled out
"What have you done? you've touch THE great ape!". The village erupted in panic, parents grabbed their
children and all The Villagers disappeared into the jungle. No one was left but the Photographer. He got into his car to
make a fast get away, but the car kept stalling. Panicing he kept treing and he could hear the Great Ape getting closer
and closer. He got the car started as soon as he heard the Great Ape enter the village. The Photographer hit the gas and
drove as fast as the car could go.
Into through the desert the speedometer topped out at 120mph. The Photographer had never driven this fast before, he
tried to remain calm. There could be no way the Great Ape could follow him now, it couldn't possible be this fast.
This trip didn't feel as long the Photographer couldn't tell he was just to scared. He was almost out of gas
as he pulled into the gas station, he needed a rest. The Attendant came out to fill up the gas tank, looked at the
Photographer in his current state and asked "What happend?" Then the Attendant looked into the distance and
saw a little shadow getting closer and bigger.
The Gas Station Attendant's eyes went wide as he hollered, "Ya did it, didn't ya, ya fool! YOU touched
THE great ape!". The Attendant didn't finish refueling the Photographer's car, he got in his truck and
took off away from there. Now really panicing the Photographer finished gaing his car, got back in it and turned the
key. The engine was silent, all he could hear was the sound of the Great Ape getting closer and closer. Banging on the
dash, curseing at his car he tried to start it up again. He got it to turn over, but it kept stalling. And the Great Ape
got closer and closer. The Photographer tried one last time as he saw the shadow of the Great Ape tower over his
car.
The car came to life and the Photographer once again pushed the pedal to the floor, throttle wide open got out of there
fearing for his life. Every one that seen the Great Ape coming ran in terror, but the Photographer beleived the Great
Ape was coming for him. By time the Photographer got back into the city he was exhausted. He got into his apartment and
hide under his bed.
A few hours later, the Photographer could hear the terror in the streets. The sound of the Great Ape picking up cars and
tossing them aside, people fleeing in terror. The Photographer then heard the sound of the Great Ape stop right outside
his apartment, the Great Ape remembered the Photographer's car. The Photographer knew he should not have parked his
car right in front of his apartment. The Great Ape tore the front door right off the apartment and entered into it. The
Photographer could hear the Great Ape smashing through the place, looking for him. The Great Ape entered the bedroom,
looked every where untill it noticed the bed was shakeing. The Great Ape grabbed the bed and threw it aside, leaveing
the Photographer there cowering in fear.
The Photographer pleded with the Great Ape wimpering "Please...please don't hurt me." The Great Ape
tapped the Photographer litely on the shoulder like a feather and said....
"TAG! YOUR it!"
