~Poem~ Bliss - Minitokyo

Minitokyo » Forum » Off-topic Discussions » ~Poem~ Bliss

page 1 of 1 9 total items

masterjesse89 Master of ALL Things Spiffy

I dont think it posted the first time I tried. OH well... If it did I will delete this one...

any way. This is my second poem... I wrote it last night when I couldnt sleep... It is short.... The title goes perfectly with what I was thinking so... yea...dont mock it!

You shun me
I repulse you
You look at me
I disgust you
You hate me
I love you.

so....yea... Tell me what you think about it... even if you hate it... make sure you tell me if you hate it!!!! um.... Have a Spiffy day!

NOW COMMENT! THE MASTER COMMANDS YOU!!!!please?

Once I desire something... I cannot undesire it.
I cannot even try to resist. I will desire it until I have it.
But there is no end
No matter how much I take. I still want.

Oct 19, 2005
Gallery

zero-walt Inuyasha

cool poem^^
You should add more feeling to your poems
okay^^
check my poems you can get some ideas out of it^^
But a good poem^^ Add more work to it^^

' Signature Image ' I am the one and only Wing Zero

Oct 19, 2005
Gallery

kagoem

I think it was good. But I do have to agree with zero-walt with adding more feeling into the poem though.

Oct 19, 2005
Gallery

Erinecera Cat Lover

NIce poem, masterjess... yeah, it lacks feeling... anyway, it's still good.

I l o v e c a t s !
=^-^= <--- this my loving sidekick, Martin

Oct 19, 2005
Gallery

b3nitora Rehab is for Quitters!!

I liked it, short and sweet. :D

Signature
Image
"I said No to drugs, but they would'nt listen."

Oct 19, 2005
Gallery

colleenerb

I Thought it was really sad and somewhat angry.I dunno I kinda like it and I didnt really think it was lacking in feeling.However I felt I loved someone who seemed to hate me and be disgusted by me so maybe thats why.Anyways great work. :)

This signature violates the signature guidelines, thus it has been removed.