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How do you ignore the others?

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Odeena

Odeena

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I'm having this really big problem with those around me. I live in a small city with fairly old mentalities and a lot of stupid people. Most of the older people still cling to the Communist way of thinking and they label people as 'bad' if they are free-thinkers or free-speakers. Young people are uneducated for the better part and are rebels without a cause, because they hate the way their parents think, but they're too dumb to develop their own system of values, and so they're pretty much ignorant and all they know is to point fingers, laugh and hurt just for the pleasure of it - because that makes them feel superior when in fact they're not.

And because I'm different from most of the people around me (I'm a free thinker, a free speaker, I dress differently than most girls my age because I don't like to look whore-ish like they do, I listen to black metal etc.), I often get laughed at or pointed the finger at or other nasty stuff like that. How can I learn to ignore all that? Because honestly, I can't stand it any more and I feel like I'm going to crack... Any suggestions are welcome.

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zuuti

zuuti

life is unexamined to me

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this is the thing as most people now me im bosnean meaning that i now how u feel i am different for that i can say do what ever i wont if u dont like me idc im the guy that loves to be alon tell some one comes to me im thy guy that hate's fake peole dont be something u dont wont to just to make friends i mean come on if u have to chang ur self to make other happey or something why do it be u do what's right.

im not the one that now's every thing or is the best im just a friend that's all i am.

people that are different are the best to me becuz if every one is the same i wood just die ill be bord like cray'z i hate same stoff.

ur friend z

KOROU1234

KOROU1234

NICE TO MEET U.

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JUST BE WHO U R. I KNOW TOLERATING SUCH PEOPLE IS NEARLY IMPOSSIBLE. I DON'T KNOW HOW U MUST HAVE TOLERATED THEM FOR SO MANY YEARS. I TOO HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM. SO, I HAVE ACTUALLY STOP LISTENING TO THEIR OPINIONS AND CONSIDERING OR PAYING ATTENTION TO WHAT THEY SAY OR THINK ABOUT ME. I DON'T CARE.IF THEY DON'T LIKE ME LISTENING TO ENGLISH SONGS, SO BE IT. WHAT THESE PEOPLE DON'T UDERSTAND IS THAT EVERY HUMANBEING IS DIFFERENT FROM EACH OTHER IN SOME OR OTHER WAY. WE CANNOT ALWAYS FOLLOW THEIR SAYING . THE BEST WAY TO IGNORE THEM IS THINK WHAT THEY SAY TO U AND JUST LAUGH IT ALL OUT.

Sabbathiel

Sabbathiel

+++Cali+++

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How do I ignore the others?
With silence... I make my own world when I'm sad or I'm listening to music.... when I'm angry with opiniopn of another people I scream...
I'm very impulsiv..
I don't know how can I help you.. but I wish you better situation
[sorry for my bad english]

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rorenzu

rorenzu

Mio Amakura

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if you're really a free thinker,you say, then why do you mind what other people are saying?
be open minded,if you're so affected with what they are saying against you (which i believe they don't actually understand), then you'll most likely have the tendency to act like them...
the thing is, you've decided to be different, stand like one,if you keep on being affected with their doing, you'll eventually fall and become like them,,
you should stop wanting their acceptance because that would only happen if they become as smart as you are.
just stick to your belief as long as you're not hurting anybody else,..

Together...forever...
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OokamiKanashimi

OokamiKanashimi

Now & Here

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hrumph. i fink i just pratend to lining that their saying , to ignore someone , and ofcorse make sarcastic smile , It help's much . But to me it's isn't offen, for now i ignore 2 people only... :D

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hmm..I have a problem similar to that, in one of my glasses I'm surrounded by idiotic guys and they sit there and mess with me the whole class (like make fun of my hair, eyes, clothes, etc...) and I'm not very good at ignoring people and I often blow up and get in trouble for yelling in that class but I have found that I can find a temporary sanctuary in books or music so when ever I can I read or listen to music in that class. If that doesn't work you could always give em the death stare, I've found it scares a few people into shutting up :P. If these don't work I'm sorry, I tried my best.

OokamiKanashimi

OokamiKanashimi

Now & Here

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Odeena , you can do same , to those who makes laugh at you. Make them feel dump, .Strange thing, im almost same as you , but i don't realy get any atention. Well... i don't get any atention... think why... .And for ignoring... well, it' in my D.N.A :D and i can't help much with that....

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Lilifer

Lilifer

Y Lawliet

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Hello Odeena, until I can say that we are a little similar, I am a free thinker, I have my own opinions (that most of the time differ of the other people) but nor that I will impose that they are the truth; if they think in a way different from you, just ignore, therefore ignorant people only get to live in the limit of its own world; that doesn't make equal to them, and accept that like them they are, continuing like you is, therefore one day they can end up noticing that the world doesn't only revolve in them, nor in its small worlds.

Excuse my terrible English!

A-10hybrid

A-10hybrid

My cookies!

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Stay that way. Their only pointing fingers, not coming inot your house with guns or paintspraying your walls.

Yeah.... Credits to Elena (Toya999) for the sig, err the avatar.

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Odeena it is hard to learn not to care what others think about you. I am still learning... I am going blind and I refuse to use my red and white cane because I hate the way ignorant people stare at me. I really should use it because I can't see but I still can see enough to see them looking at me and talking about me. Even old people do it. I look completely normal all except for my cane. And that makes all the difference to them. It makes people not talk to me. It makes them avoid me and point at me. So I know what you are going though. But I am a coward and I try to hide it. So I applaud you for being different and being proud of it. I try not to let those people bother me but I can't help it sometimes. Why do they have to be jerks?! :angry: I guess in Romania things are the same way as in the US? I guess they are the same way all over the world. Why are people so stuck on themselves and why can't we just accept everyone for who they are? I guess I am asking for a Utopian society but someday I wish that is what we could have.

eXDream2K5

eXDream2K5

the crazy band geek

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You and I don't exactly share the same situations, but we're alike from what I can tell. I too am a free-thinker, a free-speaker, I don't dress like a whore like most other girls I know, and I don't listen to music that's popular with my peers. I've gotten some nasty comments in the past, and I had a lot of trouble dealing with it. The negativity built up inside me and made me suicidal until I realized that people like that don't matter.

Now I just do what I want and be the person my mom, her brother, and my cousin have always said that I could be. I stopped listening to the people who bad-talked me, I stopped caring about what they thought. Ten or so years from now, they won't matter. I'm proud of who I am, of where I came from, and I'm proud of the fact that I want to do better for myself. You should be proud of yourself too.

I will always be me. You will always be you. No one can ever change that. No one can ever take your individuality away from you unless you allow them to. Don't ever give in to what they think you should do, think, or be.

Good luck!

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Haohmaru77

Haohmaru77

Stray Wanderer

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Your situation is regular stuff here. actualy, just consider this: they are what they want to be. you, on the other side, are waht you want to be. if they mess up with you, think that theyre just people, stupid people for judging others because of the way they think, and just dont let their comments get to you. its all about learning to listen to insults but not taking them, see, you know that what they say isnt true, right? so just let them say anything they want...
theyre people, like you, so they have no right to judge you.

You could also not act rebellious in front of them, but i guess that'd be faking...

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KyRei

KyRei

Ky_Rei

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I can't relate to your situation because where I'm at it is not like that at all that you've described above. However I believe you should stay the way you are and ignoring those people who don't accept who you are. You can try to open their minds so they won't be conserved to just one way of thinking. You can ask them, why this, why that. During this, you're bound to run into some interests. Don't let those people enforce their ways on you! IT IS GOOD TO BE DIFFERENT AND TO HAVE YOUR OWN ORIGINALITY! Don't give up! I hope I have helped a little.

Odeena

Odeena

Web Designer Extraordinare

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Quote by A-10hybridStay that way. Their only pointing fingers, not coming inot your house with guns or paintspraying your walls.

Well, actually they did paintspray my door once, they drew a large green cross on it :\ But that's not the point here :P

Thanks to everyone who replied so far. Again, you're really helping me out. I realized that what I need to find is the courage to keep my head up even though this *will* be hard at first, and to ignore what they say. I realize that I've been afraid of what they might do if I ignore them and all that, but then again - what can they do? It's not like they'll go after me with torches and forks... right? ...I hope so :)

@cheza2283 - Ignorant people are the same everywhere, it's just their numbers that differ. I sympathize with you, and I know how it's like to have people stare at you because you're different in any way... But I found a temporary solution, at least - when you walk, you can listen to music. That way you won't hear anything of the blabbing around you. Trust me - it works ;)

@rorenzu - Point taken. *ducks head in shame* Why didn't I think about that earlier?

@clueless06 - I should try that, too... Actually, I have a pretty good death stare. I remember one of my friends took a cigarette from me to mock me, and it happened to be my last one... I scared him from the distance into giving it back with my stare X-P And, you should be happy that those people are just in one class and not all around you...

I hope I'll get the chance to reply to everyone else soon, either here or via your GB. Thanks for your help - it really means something :)

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A-10hybrid

A-10hybrid

My cookies!

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So your saying I'm no help!? People here are basically saying for you to stay the way you want to be. What does the green cross mean?

Yeah.... Credits to Elena (Toya999) for the sig, err the avatar.

Sabbathiel

Sabbathiel

+++Cali+++

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[h]Ello again,
I think that everyone are different even when the think the are the same, we could have similiar situation, but our feelings are not always the same, it's depends of character or childhood... the society will always course about the young people and we can't help that :) but we can try to undersand ther opinions, they have life-expirence and we must agree that it's very important, it's possible that they were also "rebel", but they are now passiv, they want to life theyr lifes in silent and peace. They are affraid of young people energie, they agression, new time has come, "new time is always coming" :)
Maybe I think in wrong way, but I have very difficult personality [character], and I must fight with myself every day, because I can be angree in one second and I can scream or yell... even if there no reason [obvious I see the reason in the moment] but later... I'm confused and I'm sorry for that, I spoke many bad words to may family..
I'm not watching TV for very long time, because I become nervous and bad toughts.. the NEWS are always bad, the political situation are also bad... [in Poland, where I life is terible at the moment, new regiment... damn it..] Since I'm not watching so many bad news I'm peacer [a little bit ^_^].
I think the "freethinker" will always have trouble with acceptation because of human nature and we must deal with it. I will not give up, I will fight till end but I won't hurt my family.. also.. compromiss is important...

oh my gods.. so many word in english.. hehe.. I had never wrote so much in this language.. hehe.. sorry for my bad english. I prevere german ^_^

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Odeena

Odeena

Web Designer Extraordinare

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@A-10hybrid - Like I said in your GB, too - you've been of great help, alongside everyone else, and thank you :)

@Sabbathiel - check your GB ;)

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Sabbathiel

Sabbathiel

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Dear Odeena,
thank you :) and be strong ^_^

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crsg

crsg

Artemis

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I'm afraid you really can't ignore it. If it gets to you, it gets to you, and there's no changing that. What you could do is try to be patient, though. Some day, you won't live where you are anymore. Some day, perhaps not too long away, you'll be living in a place of your own choosing, surrounded by people who you choose to spend your time with. The waiting is the hard part, but everybody has to do it.

Tia-Noemi

Tia-Noemi

Yuri no Tiarys

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o_o That's a difficult situation. Like crsg said, you can't ignore something where its plentiful. And since ignoring isn't going to be an option, because those who insult and pester you are only going to think that you have withdrawn further into your protective shell and further want to tease you and other things. So you must have to stand up for what you want to believe in. If you think that doing that is a bit outlandish for you, then, you will just have to bear it. There will be a time and age when something like that shan't happen. Things will always turn for the best at some point...

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Just be yourself and stand up for yourself (mind you: this may make things worst for a time) but once you start defending yourself people around you will start realize how much you value yourself and how high a self esteem you really have.

In order to obtain, something of equal value must be lost. This is the first law of equivalent exchange

Sallyf322

Sallyf322

*_Amateur Guitarist_*

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At times like this, some people just don't "fit in," whatever that may mean -_- I'm sure you're not the only different one in your area, and if you feel that you are, don't let it bother you. I'm a little different too, but no one around my area sounds as immature as those who point and laugh at you -_- In your case, I would just ignore those people by simply pretending they don't exist. I often find it better to block them out that way, or read/listen to music/etc. to prevent yourself from getting absorbed into their ridicule. They're only damaging their own image if they're immature kids who still point and laugh at someone who's different...and someone who's totally ignoring their crap.

Just stay true to yourself, because sometimes, the "right" crowd can be the "wrong" crowd.

"If everyone cared and nobody cried, if everyone loved and nobody lied, if everyone shared and swallowed their pride, then we'd see the day...when nobody died. I'm singing amen I, amen I, I'm alive." - Nickelback: "If Everyone Cared."

If only, if only, the world were like this. If only, if only, it only existed.

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hey, just dont pay attention to them, those people who do bad things like that, are just jealous bcuz u have something that they dont, it's called maturity... and u can only be accepted by being youself, not someone else... and ur not alone, i'm going through the same thing as ur now, every single day at school... and those people who make fun of u have no life at all...

well, let me to u something... i've been bugged by this girl who rides my bus for now a whole year... every day and today, i have to put up with all this bull shit that she's saying... including getting into fights in which she 'says' that any hit that she takes doesnt even hurt... and yes, she makes fun of how i look, sing, dress, talk, etc... so yeah, she's pretty much a bitch...

well, i hope i gave u something... to know about... but yeah, u can also give those people the cold shoulder... i hope i helped ya out...

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