All the potential and none of the skill.

Tagged under Kim Jea Eun

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jakuro

jakuro

殁 4 LIFE

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Wallpaper in progress : http://starrpersians.com/temp/sunlight.jpg

Inspired by : http://youtu.be/fx8ZKG3ybHo

Scan : http://starrpersians.com/temp/running-on-empty_ce2254215421.jpg

Vision : Its a guy in a window. For the wall.. I reversed his facing - so he's facing into a strange room, with this intense sky/sun behind him. The character himself, is a little more intense than brooding, he just doesn't see beauty/hope in the world any longer. So I make the connection of something as beautiful and life-giving as the sun, with his back to it, and a feeling of disdain. More empty than sad. You get the idea.


Dilemma:
Conceptually.. I really like this. However, I'm having issues with making him look natural as though he belongs there, you know? The shading will have to be very strong and I lack the know-how to do that in either painting or vector style. I am definitely seeking to perfect this wallpaper, so please give me any suggestions that fit my vision and theme for this wall. I would like to keep the main focus on the guy and sky, of course, so the room will be empty, and there should be no other strong focal points.
I would like to keep a dark/grungy room, with a very Graphical, almost signature-style sky and lighting. And.. I know this is small but.. I eyes open or closed!? If I have them open then I want him to look a little pissed off. If they are closed then I can avoid that and just have him look like he's frowning in his sleep or something. hahaha

My ideas:
Making the window more apparent, making it look like an open window instead of just a blank square.
Cut off/shape a corner into the left side to make it look more natural and fill negative space. OR Crumble/crack the wall on the left side and open it up to more sky (probably out of my skill level as well - slightly out of theme but would look neat)
Add another curtain to the left side.

Overall I need some damn good tips/tutorials that I havent seen before
OR
Someone needs to collab with me.

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::wake up in a dying world looking like the antidote::

singlemoon

singlemoon

..keeping out the negativities..

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This is only my opinion so it may clash a bit your idea.
My idea, first of all, change the brick to plain black wall and paint something there, like flowers or maybe something like this, to add mysterious air/unexplained thing in the wall (tree branch vector ) Increase the size of the window, take some space in the center and below the wallpaper for the window. So it'll also decrese the negative space.
Erase the shadow on the guy, and I think the color for the skin are too 'yellowish' so you might want to change it. The color code for the skin color(my preference) is f9e3d, not sure if it's the same for everyone. Smooth up the lines for the curtain, it should looks, soft and wavy.
How about you go for no eyes? :D

Uhm..I need to see the edited version before I can help any further..sorry..

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-in a place where lies and truth form an unbreakable bond-

Valuna

Retired Moderator

Valuna

Naughty Artist

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There is just way too much black on the wallpaper. It would be better to reduce the dark side and make it something like a border. It tends to get quickly too much like what happened in your current progress. You focused everything in one corner. It's like having a house and you put everything in one place while the rest is completely empty. People don't do that because it looks ugly when you don't use all of the available space to create something good.

I don't think the lighting is completely good on the character. I suggest you look more at where the "light source" is and work from that (maybe recreating a similair situation in real life of the light source and object will help out to make it realistic). Because the background is pretty dark, I think the part of the shading that's the most in the shadows should be really dark, depending on the strength of the light of course.

Some points you might want to reconsider:
- The texture looks blurry on the wall.
- Be careful of jaggies.

Love, Valuna.

These beautiful, fragile days are reborn, unfaded
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jakuro

jakuro

殁 4 LIFE

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This is a rough draft, you know. Like a sketch. I was by no means going to post this as it is, I know things are blurry/jagged/ill-lit I was just slapping it together so I didn't forget my ******* idea.

k so.. From these two critiques - I'll lighten up the wall, despite my original idea, and do some personal vector work on the wall, like he's been drawing on it.
You know.. I really would like to keep the flaming sky sort of thing, I'll vector the shading since I've recently figured out how to do that decently.. that way I can have that crazy orange without it taking over the photo with blur etc.

I really like your idea, singlemoon. Thanks for sharing. I look forward to "painting" on his wall :3

Valuna, I think you are exceptional at what you do - but I think you're a little too technical. I know all these rules, I've known them since 4th grade - I know light, I know space, etc etc - I want you to look past the lines, and the lighting, to the image of the concept of this character and what he's doing. What vision do you have for it? singlemoon saw a wall with flowers drawn on it and a more natural lighting, and a curtain that is caught in the wind, looking fluid and soft.

I want to know what you see for this, how does your mind tie the piece together? This is what I look for in a critique is an inspired artistic vision. There is nothing wrong with being technical, it will produce fine work - but I'm aiming for a little more originality for this piece - I'm searching for a completed look for an unfinished concept. I should have explained that better in my original post.

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::wake up in a dying world looking like the antidote::

Valuna

Retired Moderator

Valuna

Naughty Artist

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My apologies, Jakuro.

Even as a rough draft, you should have the concept ready, including the composition. I basically told you that your current composition is incorrect and some other things. You might have known them since the fourth grade but not everyone does it. I'm rational when judging, and try to perfectize the purpose of the art. I don't have a vision, my vision is your vision. You're not looking for inspiration from others, you are looking for suggestions to use to help you along the way. This is because you have already created your vision, not looking for it. The only thing I have to do, is take your vision in consideration and judge it with a second opinion, including technical parts.

But whatever you want. Instead of having a normal moon, I would suggest some sort of eclipse, since it does refer to some kind of darkness. That way, the red sky will also make more sense itself. For the rest, a broken opened window, just one would be enough, and let it open. It will also fill up part of your background at the same time, unless you want to put it the other way, just make sure it somehow shows. If you want to use the flower idea, I would reposition him more to the middle and work your way around it. Make it look like there is a lot of colours, and yet it's dark.

These beautiful, fragile days are reborn, unfaded
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jakuro

jakuro

殁 4 LIFE

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Words are so limited! I really am looking for a better concept since mine was so rough - The eclipse is a great idea, I can play that into it and it would allow me to use black in the wall vectors. Which I am really fond of for sure
To clarify my reason for saying I know the basics, was just to say I'm aware that it needs to be enlarged/moved - it would have balanced out in the remake regardless since I am incorporating more space, I would have to change his size/position anyway. I was just trying to imply that I know this.

Thank you for your input :) I wasnt trying to offend or sound haughty though just to be sure you know

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::wake up in a dying world looking like the antidote::

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