Hi, just a little problem that has totally been bugging me over the past 2
months.
I've been dating my current boyfriend for almost a year now, 3 months from being
a year in total.
One of my ex boyfriends recently e-mailed me 2 months ago begging to have me
back in the most pathetic manner, but i didnt respond. Followed by that e-mail,
came 20 more e-mails, plus him adding me
to msn messenger and bothering me. Obviously, you can guess what happened next.
He totally cussed me out using the worst names possible towards me because i
wouldnt leave my current boyfriend for him. Then, i saw him while i was out with
some friends during last month, and he pretended to not know me, after that, a
week later, he came up to me on the street and started talking nicely to me and
asked me if i'd be his again.
This was really getting on my nerves, so i started to ignore him once again. The
thing is, when he broke up with me, it was for stupid reasons as well, also, he
was pathetic enough to break up with me in hotmail. You'd think he'd do it in
person right?
Recently, i created a new e-mail because my old one was being spammed, and he
found out my new e-mail and started begging me again and once again called me
names when i refused, and even now on my cellphone he's leaving crazy messages
about how he loves me and that he was wrong for what he did etc.
I was wondering if anyone has any advice to tell me on how to stop this guy from
bothering me. I mean, i've told him to lay off of it, but he just wont
stop.
Woah, that's bad.... That's basically what I call stalking... Except, I doubt
you could go to the police with that, coz' obviously, they'll tell you they
can't help you <.< One of my mom's ex-boyfriends did something similar to
her, and the only way she managed to get rid of him is threaten to call the
police, move, and change phone numbers (make it confidential)... but, if you
changed e-mails and he found it, then it's pretty much hopeless... Do you know
how he did that by the way?
And if you did tell him to back off because you're not interested, then I guess
you did pretty much everything you could do in the matter... And the guy is an
idiot for not understanding you've moved on, unlike him obviously... then again,
his ambiguous attitude, ignoring you then begging you to come back is a little
bizarre... <.<
It sucks, but I really don't know how to help you
sorry.
I would say file a harassment charge because this guy doesn't exactly seem
stable. And as for your e-mail and stuff I'd suggest blocking him, call your
phone company and see if their'd be a way to block his number. Now if this
compels him to come to your house then you might have to file a restraining
order. I'd also make as many people aware of this where you live as possible
because you might need witnesses if you do have to get a restraining order.
Quote by FloralFallalI would say
file a harassment charge because this guy doesn't exactly seem stable. And as
for your e-mail and stuff I'd suggest blocking him, call your phone company and
see if their'd be a way to block his number. Now if this compels him to come to
your house then you might have to file a restraining order. I'd also make as
many people aware of this where you live as possible because you might need
witnesses if you do have to get a restraining
order.
This may be the only way for you to get this guy to leave you alone. Good luck.
harassment charge missy- first, warn him, and if he does it again, get the
police involved, especially your parents as well= usually a nice "excuse me
your son is harassing my daughter" works wonders
I agree with belmiky, except that the police is a bit much. I suggest warning
him that you'll tell his parents possibly, but you may just want to talk with
your parents about it, or possibly a guidance counselor or someone in a position
such as that one at your school.
See if you can Google Canada's laws on what constitute stalking, because this
definitely sounds like stalking to me.
I'd definitely block his phone #s, and getting your parents talking to his is a
very good idea. His parents are in a very good position to ask him what his
problem is, and they can keep tabs on him as far as asking him where he's going,
who he's trying to call on the phone again, that type of thing. Just the threat of being audited can put
a crimp in his tactics. If that doesn't work, then talk to the local police and
ask what evidence they need to open up a stalking case and/or restraining order
against this guy, and collect whatever evidence or eyewitness they need. It
doesn't sound like being nice about it is going to work.
As far as the e-mail, well, when I signed up with Cox, I had to agree to
this:
Quote by Cox Acceptable Use PolicyProhibited
Activities. You may not use the Service in a manner that violates any applicable
local, state, federal or international law, order or regulation. Additionally,
You may not use the Service to:
...Invade another person's privacy, stalk, harass, or otherwise violate the
rights of others.
Whichever e-mail service the guy uses probably has a similar clause; look it up.
Then, any harassing e-mails he sends in the future, store them for future use as
evidence, both to contact his e-mail/internet service provider, and for the
police. You can probably make life suck for this guy if he keeps it up; you just
have to go through the right channels.
This guy sounds extremely pathethic and verbally abusive.
You know, stop ignoring him and kick his ass! YES!
Oh... Asigha's idea is nice... Restraining order... That'll possibly make him
F**KING mad! @__@
Well, I guess I talked through my hat, as usual, you can definitely look for
help, as mentioned above. And, well, I was curious, so I did a little research
on Google regarding harassment in Canada, because this is exactly what it is
that he is doing to you. This FAQ I found was pretty interesting, and takes back
advices that were already given to you. Along with a definition of what
harassment is, and this shows up :
Quote by FAQWhat does stalking/criminal
harassment look like?
Stalking/criminal harassment can include a number of different behaviours
intended to control and frighten the person being stalked. Most commonly, this
can involve:
It's not really that he looks dangerous in your case, though I really wouldn't
know I guess, but this attitude of his must certainly annoy you, and you have
the right to say you're not interested, and he should have enough respect to
understand that "no" means "no".
Quote by belmikryharassment charge
missy- first, warn him, and if he does it again, get the police involved,
especially your parents as well= usually a nice "excuse me your son is
harassing my daughter" works wonders
i have to agree with that, it whould be wisly to pull ''higher-up's'' when your
own power whont do anything,
was that right said?
because when your words arent enough, and you cant stop him/them, then it's
always a good idea to get someone how has more power, or status then you, like
your parents, + just ignore him, dont talk to him, and you did tell him that you
dont care about him/dont like him right?
you could just say the more he ask the more you will say no, he was the first
one to leav anyway, his problem, silentmasamune is your current boyfriend
right?
stick to him then, he's far better then that jerk of a guy. i'm no pro in stuff
like this since i'm not very good in explaining and telling, and normally i
would say what I would do
which i didn't do this time
also it would be a good idea to ask people with experience in this
but i still have my doubts that the guy will just try in secret asking you, so
the police as said would also do somthing good. well hope what i said could help
Cuss his arse out so badly and tell him and pathetic
and meaningless he is to the point that he'll just implode on himself from the
verbal and emotion lashing.Or that's what one of my friends would do, hehe XP.
Well, just tell him off, tell him you want nothing to do with him because he's
still the same as he was when you were dating and you want nothing to do with
him. If he wants to be friends, fine, but he nees to cut that creepy
Unfaithful-ish nonsense out before you slap a restraining order on his arse.
[belmikry edited for family friendly psoting ]
Bwahahaha... Just get your current boyfriend to harass him back. If he gets
spammed by his rival with you at his side, then the ex-boyfriend would
either:
1: Realize it's hopeless and give up
2: Get angry and try to kill your current boyfriend, in which case he'd get
owned because:
A: It's two on one
B: Girls are officially allowed to kick below the belt and pull on hair
Usually I'd say "talk it out," but you seem to have already tried
that... changing emails won't work, and everyone else said to call the police
and stuff, so I guess I've said my bit
The general consensus seems to be "go to the police", which seems like
a good idea given the actions done by your ex. As for phone, mail and MSN, you
can block him out. If he changes anything just to contact you, block him again.
Be adamant about it. (Or continue to be so, depending.....)
Don't delete the mails he sends, though. Just store them away in another folder
in case you need them for the police. (As someone mentioned.)
Refrain from getting physical with him, though. (That counts for both you and your boyfriend.) That might damage your
case if you require police assistance. (Unless we're talking self-defense,
but.....)
Hi, just a little problem that has totally been bugging me over the past 2 months.
I've been dating my current boyfriend for almost a year now, 3 months from being a year in total.
One of my ex boyfriends recently e-mailed me 2 months ago begging to have me back in the most pathetic manner, but i didnt respond. Followed by that e-mail, came 20 more e-mails, plus him adding me to msn messenger and bothering me. Obviously, you can guess what happened next. He totally cussed me out using the worst names possible towards me because i wouldnt leave my current boyfriend for him. Then, i saw him while i was out with some friends during last month, and he pretended to not know me, after that, a week later, he came up to me on the street and started talking nicely to me and asked me if i'd be his again.
This was really getting on my nerves, so i started to ignore him once again. The thing is, when he broke up with me, it was for stupid reasons as well, also, he was pathetic enough to break up with me in hotmail. You'd think he'd do it in person right?
Recently, i created a new e-mail because my old one was being spammed, and he found out my new e-mail and started begging me again and once again called me names when i refused, and even now on my cellphone he's leaving crazy messages about how he loves me and that he was wrong for what he did etc.
I was wondering if anyone has any advice to tell me on how to stop this guy from bothering me. I mean, i've told him to lay off of it, but he just wont stop.
Please and thank you
I don't know what to tell you; You've done everything I could think of. HOpefully, other people will come up with something.
Sorry, but I can't come up with another alternative for you.
Woah, that's bad.... That's basically what I call stalking... Except, I doubt you could go to the police with that, coz' obviously, they'll tell you they can't help you <.< One of my mom's ex-boyfriends did something similar to her, and the only way she managed to get rid of him is threaten to call the police, move, and change phone numbers (make it confidential)... but, if you changed e-mails and he found it, then it's pretty much hopeless... Do you know how he did that by the way?
And if you did tell him to back off because you're not interested, then I guess you did pretty much everything you could do in the matter... And the guy is an idiot for not understanding you've moved on, unlike him obviously... then again, his ambiguous attitude, ignoring you then begging you to come back is a little bizarre... <.<
It sucks, but I really don't know how to help you
sorry.
I would say file a harassment charge because this guy doesn't exactly seem stable. And as for your e-mail and stuff I'd suggest blocking him, call your phone company and see if their'd be a way to block his number. Now if this compels him to come to your house then you might have to file a restraining order. I'd also make as many people aware of this where you live as possible because you might need witnesses if you do have to get a restraining order.
I completely agree with what FloralFallal says:
This may be the only way for you to get this guy to leave you alone. Good luck.
harassment charge missy- first, warn him, and if he does it again, get the police involved, especially your parents as well= usually a nice "excuse me your son is harassing my daughter" works wonders
I agree with belmiky, except that the police is a bit much. I suggest warning him that you'll tell his parents possibly, but you may just want to talk with your parents about it, or possibly a guidance counselor or someone in a position such as that one at your school.
You could always eat him? This works very well in certain species of insect and arthropods.
Howdy! I'm glad this caught my eye.
See if you can Google Canada's laws on what constitute stalking, because this definitely sounds like stalking to me.
I'd definitely block his phone #s, and getting your parents talking to his is a very good idea. His parents are in a very good position to ask him what his problem is, and they can keep tabs on him as far as asking him where he's going, who he's trying to call on the phone again, that type of thing. Just the threat of being audited can put a crimp in his tactics. If that doesn't work, then talk to the local police and ask what evidence they need to open up a stalking case and/or restraining order against this guy, and collect whatever evidence or eyewitness they need. It doesn't sound like being nice about it is going to work.
As far as the e-mail, well, when I signed up with Cox, I had to agree to this:
Whichever e-mail service the guy uses probably has a similar clause; look it up. Then, any harassing e-mails he sends in the future, store them for future use as evidence, both to contact his e-mail/internet service provider, and for the police. You can probably make life suck for this guy if he keeps it up; you just have to go through the right channels.
I hope this helps- tell me if it works. Ciao!
Um...put a restraining order on him
Hey girl... Would you like an Gmail account?
This guy sounds extremely pathethic and verbally abusive.
You know, stop ignoring him and kick his ass! YES!
Oh... Asigha's idea is nice... Restraining order... That'll possibly make him F**KING mad! @__@
Honestly, I don't know what to tell you....
Well, I guess I talked through my hat, as usual, you can definitely look for help, as mentioned above. And, well, I was curious, so I did a little research on Google regarding harassment in Canada, because this is exactly what it is that he is doing to you. This FAQ I found was pretty interesting, and takes back advices that were already given to you. Along with a definition of what harassment is, and this shows up :
Really interesting... there are also links to other websites for stalker victims, here's the link : http://www.metrac.org/new/faq_sta.htm
It's not really that he looks dangerous in your case, though I really wouldn't know I guess, but this attitude of his must certainly annoy you, and you have the right to say you're not interested, and he should have enough respect to understand that "no" means "no".
Hope this helps even a little
Good luck
i have to agree with that, it whould be wisly to pull ''higher-up's'' when your own power whont do anything,
was that right said?
which i didn't do this time
also it would be a good idea to ask people with experience in this
because when your words arent enough, and you cant stop him/them, then it's always a good idea to get someone how has more power, or status then you, like your parents, + just ignore him, dont talk to him, and you did tell him that you dont care about him/dont like him right?
you could just say the more he ask the more you will say no, he was the first one to leav anyway, his problem, silentmasamune is your current boyfriend right?
stick to him then, he's far better then that jerk of a guy. i'm no pro in stuff like this since i'm not very good in explaining and telling, and normally i would say what I would do
but i still have my doubts that the guy will just try in secret asking you, so the police as said would also do somthing good. well hope what i said could help
who are u talking is it ur last boyfriend because he just a loser
Cuss his arse out so badly and tell him and pathetic and meaningless he is to the point that he'll just implode on himself from the verbal and emotion lashing.Or that's what one of my friends would do, hehe XP. Well, just tell him off, tell him you want nothing to do with him because he's still the same as he was when you were dating and you want nothing to do with him. If he wants to be friends, fine, but he nees to cut that creepy Unfaithful-ish nonsense out before you slap a restraining order on his arse. [belmikry edited for family friendly psoting
]
i guess most of what i thought, would do, would say has been said already........ so i guess i'll just say..... hope you get the guy locked away!
all the best
Bwahahaha... Just get your current boyfriend to harass him back. If he gets spammed by his rival with you at his side, then the ex-boyfriend would either:
1: Realize it's hopeless and give up
2: Get angry and try to kill your current boyfriend, in which case he'd get owned because:
A: It's two on one
B: Girls are officially allowed to kick below the belt and pull on hair
Usually I'd say "talk it out," but you seem to have already tried that... changing emails won't work, and everyone else said to call the police and stuff, so I guess I've said my bit
The general consensus seems to be "go to the police", which seems like a good idea given the actions done by your ex. As for phone, mail and MSN, you can block him out. If he changes anything just to contact you, block him again. Be adamant about it. (Or continue to be so, depending.....)
Don't delete the mails he sends, though. Just store them away in another folder in case you need them for the police. (As someone mentioned.)
Refrain from getting physical with him, though. (That counts for both you and your boyfriend.) That might damage your case if you require police assistance. (Unless we're talking self-defense, but.....)
Hopefully this will work.
or
C)Put it in. XP