SO!
I have my cousins living with us. Now, my female cousin who's 5 years older than
me hates me and ignores me. I wouldn't blame her coz I've been a pest to her
since she lived with us. But now, I want to make good with her and be a friend
to her. It would be sooo much easier living with her if we got along.
UNFORTUNATELY, she wouldn't even talk to me. And I sincerely want to befriend
this witch, er girl. So, please please help me! MY SANITY AND WELL-BEING DEPENDS
ON IT!
Hello there ! Gomen. It took me long enough to write all this while reading your dire
status.
Lol. Don't feel so sad and disappointed. You are not the only one out there
feeling trapped in your situation. All i can say, it's a real sticky situation
you got yourself into. Knowing the root of your problem is already the battle
half fought. I must say, we respect you for that! Of
course we need to hear you more since what we are hearing are just fragments of
what is happening right now. Nevertheless, here's what i have myself to advise
you on.
Now, onward to saving you !
First, i warn you. All these hatred she got herself fling at your being will not
easily come off. I'm sorry but there isn't an instantanous way to change her
hostile intent right away. ( That's to say, there ain't no easy way out for your
sake.)
Your personality towards her have to change. Into a way she can trust you as a cousin.
Summarized, you need to regain her trust and better image of
you!
Before that, you need to realise which part of youR Folly had caused her to hate
you, to the core.(Cause, she will not even acknowledge your prescence at all
from what you said) Was it something you said ? Or did ? Now, i am but a man...
so i leave that to the fellow MTer Ladies who reply to you next and you got to
listen good. Trust me. A
woman's opinion is never wrong.
Of course, i believe you did try apologise am i correct ? If so, this means you
need to work harder to recreate your cousin bonding. Find out a common goal or
interest that will involved your family or friends and include her. Talk to her
more even though she hates your guts. But, make sure you don't over do it. It
will make you appear more like a Stalker and from what i learnt from my fellow
lady friends, that's a definite no-no. Doing all the stuff all at once that you
think she likes and enjoys ain't going to do much help either. Instead, try a
more sincere approach. I'm sure you are sincere and concern about your cousin
acceptance about you in the Family.
You need to win back her trust in you, respect, bit by bit. It's a tedious
process but having a dear one close to you and acknowledge your prescence as a
Big Nephew is priceless, ya ?
This isn't an instantanous Change and win-win situation. You had to salvage them
bit by bit, part by part as you recollect on what to do (intelligently and
common sense of course!) and how to. While all these, you need to respect her as
well.
In the meantime, . . .
Exercise patience and perserverance.
Your Sincerity and honest feelings are already your best weapons. So, DoN't Give
up on it. Even if it take you months, years!
That's what i can advise you on on what you give on the current situation. I'll
try to post relevant replies if there is a need to, as your thread catches and
expands from fellow MTers who read and post on.
Well i didn't know about family persay but with strangers odds are you can never
be friends with them. if they done something so bad to you, you could never
forget you probraly hate them forever. but the only advice i could give is ask
to be friends. it might work better with family then strangers.
Thats simple
1. Whatever your doing that really pisses her off, stop it.
2. Act like nothing bad ever happened
3. Vent your anger and frustrations to your friends, not to her.
4. Before saying anything to her, pause and think if its approtiate
5. Stop trying to get her approvals and respect (this ones more of a reverse
psychology).
Ahh, first of all, recall why you pissed her off in the first place. Second, try
to be nice to her and bribe her a little bit. Just a little bit. Do caring
things to her like make her a cup of coffee in the morning or something like
that. That\'s how I get my mom to stop being mad at me. Anyways, figure out what
kind of clothes she likes and buy her something pretty (with, of course, a
reasonable prize) . Slip a hand-written card to her saying, let\'s be friends,
I\'m sorry, something like that.
Hope everything works out.
SO!
I have my cousins living with us. Now, my female cousin who's 5 years older than me hates me and ignores me. I wouldn't blame her coz I've been a pest to her since she lived with us. But now, I want to make good with her and be a friend to her. It would be sooo much easier living with her if we got along. UNFORTUNATELY, she wouldn't even talk to me. And I sincerely want to befriend this witch, er girl. So, please please help me! MY SANITY AND WELL-BEING DEPENDS ON IT!
Hello there ! Gomen.
Lol. Don't feel so sad and disappointed. You are not the only one out there feeling trapped in your situation. All i can say, it's a real sticky situation you got yourself into. Knowing the root of your problem is already the battle half fought. I must say, we respect you for that!
Of
course we need to hear you more since what we are hearing are just fragments of
what is happening right now. Nevertheless, here's what i have myself to advise
you on.
Now, onward to saving you !
First, i warn you. All these hatred she got herself fling at your being will not easily come off. I'm sorry but there isn't an instantanous way to change her hostile intent right away. ( That's to say, there ain't no easy way out for your sake.)
Your personality towards her have to change. Into a way she can trust you as a cousin. Summarized, you need to regain her trust and better image of you!
Before that, you need to realise which part of youR Folly had caused her to hate you, to the core.(Cause, she will not even acknowledge your prescence at all from what you said) Was it something you said ? Or did ? Now, i am but a man... so i leave that to the fellow MTer Ladies who reply to you next and you got to listen good. Trust me.
A
woman's opinion is never wrong.
Of course, i believe you did try apologise am i correct ? If so, this means you need to work harder to recreate your cousin bonding. Find out a common goal or interest that will involved your family or friends and include her. Talk to her more even though she hates your guts. But, make sure you don't over do it. It will make you appear more like a Stalker and from what i learnt from my fellow lady friends, that's a definite no-no. Doing all the stuff all at once that you think she likes and enjoys ain't going to do much help either. Instead, try a more sincere approach. I'm sure you are sincere and concern about your cousin acceptance about you in the Family.
You need to win back her trust in you, respect, bit by bit. It's a tedious process but having a dear one close to you and acknowledge your prescence as a Big Nephew is priceless, ya ?
This isn't an instantanous Change and win-win situation. You had to salvage them bit by bit, part by part as you recollect on what to do (intelligently and common sense of course!) and how to. While all these, you need to respect her as well.
In the meantime, . . .
Exercise patience and perserverance.
Your Sincerity and honest feelings are already your best weapons. So, DoN't Give up on it. Even if it take you months, years!
That's what i can advise you on on what you give on the current situation. I'll try to post relevant replies if there is a need to, as your thread catches and expands from fellow MTers who read and post on.
GooD Luck !
Oyasuminasei!
ok i'lll give you the easiest way.
1.smile to her
2. forget bad things about her
3. try to say hello to her
4. try to find the positive side of her
Well i didn't know about family persay but with strangers odds are you can never be friends with them. if they done something so bad to you, you could never forget you probraly hate them forever. but the only advice i could give is ask to be friends. it might work better with family then strangers.
Thats simple
1. Whatever your doing that really pisses her off, stop it.
2. Act like nothing bad ever happened
3. Vent your anger and frustrations to your friends, not to her.
4. Before saying anything to her, pause and think if its approtiate
5. Stop trying to get her approvals and respect (this ones more of a reverse psychology).
Ahh, first of all, recall why you pissed her off in the first place. Second, try to be nice to her and bribe her a little bit. Just a little bit. Do caring things to her like make her a cup of coffee in the morning or something like that. That\'s how I get my mom to stop being mad at me. Anyways, figure out what kind of clothes she likes and buy her something pretty (with, of course, a reasonable prize) . Slip a hand-written card to her saying, let\'s be friends, I\'m sorry, something like that.
Hope everything works out.