I know, I know, this is something of a blog, that's why I put it in the Spam Lounge.

Ok... I'm having a serious internal conflict with myself (duh, who else would I have it with?).

Here's the synopsis:

I have had a crush on one particular girl for about 3-4 years now, but I'm extremely shy in RL around girls I like, and can never work up enough courage to try something. X_X

I'm also taking at least 3 Honors classes and 1 AP class, with the other 2 classes being normal (Weight training and Spanish 2). My honors and AP class(es) are highly demanding in both my brain, and my time.

On top of all this -- I'm bored. This may not seem much like to you -- but I suffered severe boredom in the 2nd grade, and it led to some MAJOR depression. I found computers, which got me out of that mess, but now I can't find what I need, and I think I need a g/f.

In other words -- I have 3 main problems:

1) Too shy to even have an intelligent conversation with the girl I like

2) There's not enough time (or bodily energy, thanks to weight training) to even try to become "friends" with her.

3) Depression sucks, bad.

Anyways, that's my rant. Feel free to comment or suggest.

i think you should talk to her, let her know you like her. later in life looking back you may regret not talking to her, but if you do talk to her, at least you'll know for sure how things turned out and not have to wonder. as for your 3 issues:

1) you just have to force yourself to get to know her. the only way to get less shy around people is to get more familiar with them.

2) good relationships do usually require some time and effort, and you should be willing to set aside some time for anyone you want to be involved with. find out if she is interested and just be sure she knows your not looking for anything super serious right now, and that she knows how busy your schedule is. at some point you will probably need to decide which is more important, her or all the other activities, but you can cross that bridge when you come to it.

3) yes depression sucks. i don't think a g/f is the answer to that. while have a g/f may make you feel better, placing the responsiblity of your happiness on another person is unfair to them and usually unrealistic. you need to find what you need to change about yourself and your life to be happy, bringing another person into your life should be a seperate issue. sometimes, however, depression needs something that can treat a chemical imbalance, i.e. medication. i don't like advocating medication in general though, so i'd try something else first.

hope any of that helps, at least a little

I agree with Lost1 a girlfriend will not cure your depression problems or make everything alright. One has to be happy with themselves first before they should jump into a relationship or what is going to happen is that you will have that a girlfriend made everything ok and you'll feel like you always need a girlfriend to be happy.

Your using the lack of time as a shield for not talking to her. If you really do like her, then become friends with her first, thus make time even if its only at lunch time or a little bit of time. Try getting her email addy or see if she uses a messager.

Also becomes friends with this girl first before asking her out.

If your bored all the time this can cause mild depression, find something to do. Watch TV, Play a Game, Hang out with your friends, look at porn, just do something. Just find something small to do to pass the time.

But the most important thing is to make yourself happy before going after this girl, otherwise you'll start to think all your happiness comes from a relationship. I've seen some friends who say that can't be happy unless they have someone in their life. Its a really sad sight

Hey Vagrant123 you're in the same situation as I am, except I got rejected from the person I liked, and also we both have one too many classes to handle.....We my advice, if it does help, is if you have a friend who knows her ask that friend to introduce you to her and if you already aquainted with that person; try and get her sn or something and chat online since I see you spend quite some time online anyways. It's not as great as talking face to face but its a start and your uneasyness of talking face to face is kinda nullified. But also consider the fact that with your busy scheduel you have to be sure wether you have time to accually spend time with her if you do think about getting a bit more serious or else she might lose interest in you. Don't be depressed at least you still get to see her at school and nothing has gone wrong yet.

Stress and overwork do lead to feeling depressed. It's a tough cycle to break, but I can definitely say that if you tell yourself you're being weak and just need to gut it out, it will make things far worse. Don't feel you have to do everything well. I can also tell you that what you achieve in high school becomes of little importance later in life. Don't stress yourself out over an effort to achieve all 5's on your AP tests, etc. I had to drop cross-country in my senior year because my schedule just couldn't stand it. I would have lettered, too, but it was more important for me to have a little balance and not be running (figuratively and literally) on overdrive all year.

As for the potential girlfriend problem, how about this. If you share any classes, suggest an after-school-hours study session for the class. If not, suggest it anyway, or offer to go to the library together. If you have an appointment to study with someone you're more likely to make it. It also gives you a good, non-threatening way to just chat about school and find out more about her. Be a friend first, then if something more happens, great! It's rare to have "just a friend" of the opposite sex in high school but it's incredibly helpful.

Lastly, if you feel stressed / depressed for more than a couple weeks, go talk to an adult you trust, whether it's a youth pastor at church, your best friend's mom, or another person you would feel comfortable talking with. There are even teen centers in most towns or teen help lines you can call just to chat anonymously. Talking helps a lot. Don't be manfully strong and silent. It doesn't work -- I can guarantee it from personal experience.

Good luck and keep your friends here on MT informed as to how things are going.

--Mike