I need some advice on relationships really bad! My boyfriend and I have been together for about five months now, but we've known each other for around nine years now. Basically it's a high school sweetheart thing. We both had the same friends and hanged in the same groups. but some friends are just our own. he doesn't really get along with one or two friends that i have known just as long as him. He can stand him just enough to be around him.

Both of my friends are guys (twin brothers) and we have remained friends since graduation so he calls me every once in a while. My boyfriend didn't know until recently because my friends been in florida. I missed my friend's call and couldn't call back cause it was too late at night to call back. I told my boyfriend this the next time i saw him and he immediately asked why he was calling me knowing full well we've been friends since forever.

Later, he asks for my friend's number so he can borrow something from him. Somehow it doesn't sound like that's what he's really going to do... Since he said he would call him for me i thought maybe he could break the ice for me and tell my friend we're going out. I asked him if he called him and he still hasn't. Then, I asked him if he minded i call him. He says no... I didn't really expect him to say yes, i just wanted to know what he felt about it. It has been so long since my friend has called me last i kinda thing its rude to just say, yeah i missed your call, sorry...LOL

It's the same when we're in public too. Im the kind of person who gets flirted with a lot by guys, but i dont flirt so it's like... yeah whatever. and he notices that when we're out. if any guy looks at me in a way he doesn't like he starts to get mad at them and gives a very negative reaction (to put it mildly).

So my question is he posessive or jealous? if he is posessive is that going to be trouble for me if we stay together? And is it wrong to call my friend?

**Sorry its so long**

Well, I don't know the full details, but I would be the same... so he's just acting on his instincts. You just have to be up front with everything and say, "Look, I will share everything with you and let you know everything that goes on!" Also, communicate... just talk about feelings, his and yours, you need to stay open about all things. But then again, there's always the trust issue... sounds like there is something missing from this picture... but maybe it's just me. Does he trust you 100%? Do you trust him 100%?!?!? No I bet... that's what it sounds like on one of your ends at least.

Possessive means that he doesn't want to lose you, so he would do anything to keep you. Just make it clear you need your space, but you won't shut him out. Jealous, that's part of it too, I bet you get jealous too if girls hit on him... ^___^

But the best answer is, follow what you feel... your instincts. You know him better so you know how to deal with it from within yourself.

Remember the grounds for any relationship:

Honesty, open communication, trust, compassion, understanding, and love... etc... =D

Ok, your question? You can't exactly tell. He has a possible hint of jealousy since he just doesn't like other guys eyeing you. Possessive? Well, if all he does is thinks about wanting you and everything you do he watches over you, thats possessive. I've seen someone i've known do that. I've even pointed it out, he acknowledged it but he didn't do anything about it and soon that girl just pushed him farther away.
To tell if he is jealous, if other guys were to flirt with you (which you shouldn't back), sure it is human nature to get jealous but if he says that you are all his and that you can't go with them (to do work lets say) then jealous. Possessive is when he watches every step you make.

Possessive? Depends on how much. If he is TOO possessive, you can be in trouble. Wrong to call your friend? Nope. You should have that freedom considering that you live in the US.

I'd have to agree with jasaiyajin for the most part.
If you talk to him about what you are going to do, you are doing good. This is to clear what you are doing and you are creating trust between each other. Do anything? Not exactly but to try and keep you like you are his "object" not a person. You have your area and he has his. Both of you will get jealous if you had people hitting on either of you. Human nature.

Now, you do whatever you want but i'd say that both of you should clairify about what you both feel and try to trust each other more. If you both are really to each other, then both should trust each other and know that you aren't doing anything bad.

Good luck!

can't tell, maybe if he really likes you and all, but maybe i would say jealous and definatly not posessive..! who likes someone to firlt with their girlfriend..! maybe take to someone close like many a good friend and ask them, what you think..! they are always there for you when you need them...!

OK, here's what I think. First, it depends on what the "negative reaction" is. But if that's to put it mildly... yes, your boyfriend is both possessive and jealous. Would it be trouble next? Yes, it would. Think about it this way. Imagine the both of you are married, and he got back from work at 5. So, at 4:45, there's this salesman that was pretty cute coming buy to sell knives. Right, innocent enough, yeah? Yeah. So, he came on, showed you all the knives he brought, you thought, "Hey, could use a new paring knife," and you went in and take out your checkbook. So, the salesman thought that you're pretty nice for buying one of his knives and decided to tell you that you're one of the nicest ladies he's ever met. Nothing bad, just you know, small talk, etc. At that point, he came home. Seeing some dude in the house telling you that you're nice and pretty? Heh... combined with knives? I guess, it depends on how the guy is, too. He might go seething and grab some knives and stab the both of you, or, well, he might get pissed and yell and be in a bad mood all day. But at that point, I think, he'll have no more trust for you. Ever.

The way I see it, you just have to tell him that you deal with your own friends. And he can either back off, be friends with them, or trust you. It's up to him. No, talking, discussing, negotiating won't really do much, since it seems like he's got no trust for you. You really should realise that in the end, you live your life, and you say who's your friends and who's not. Not him. And what's the harm in flirting anyways? It makes you feel good and attractive, nothing bad happens. Just so long as you make it clear to the flirtee that you're taken and not intending to go anywhere else other than the witty banter in the mall. Sure, if they're annoying you, you can ask your boyfriend to help. But heh... getting upset because of that? That really is not his place. Next time you're in the mall, hire some model to wear sexy clothing and walk past you and him, if needs be, ask her to drop something and pick it up or something. And if he looks, then yell at him. Geez...

ehh...what are the good things about your prince charming? make a list i would say...if they outweigh the bad then stick with him, you might be able to sort it out...if not..then what are you doing with such a guy
and don't let him have the upper hand in your relationshio or you're in for disaaster...you better call your friend sometime soon...this is crazy...

hahah anyway take care and good luck...
i sure hope i was of some sort of help..