[Poem] Terror

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CLAMPchic

CLAMPchic

I'm just me

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Terror
Deep in the dark, alone in the night
Those are the times I'm consumed by my fright
Imagination runs wild, things unseen
My lips frozen in a silent scream
A hand on my shoulder, a voice in my head
Limbs weary and dragging, full of dread
A presence unkown, ever drawing near
My mind continually overwhelmed by fear
Reason abandoned, hope stolen away
I'm left wishing-nay, praying, for salvation of day.

Thanks for reading, comments are appreciated.

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"If you always do what you've always done, you'll always be what you've always been." ~ Anonymous

  • Sep 23, 2005

SilentMasamune

SilentMasamune

I'm all washed up. . .

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A very nice poem indeed. It definitely sounds as if terror fills one's heart, perhaps after a certain tragedy or bad happening, being afraid of something that might happen. It conveys such the message.

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  • Sep 23, 2005

AngelKate

AngelKate

~*Lady Sweetness*~

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Hey, that's pretty good! Sounds creepy! @_@ You convey the feeling of being very afraid or terroized by something really well. Nice job. ^_^

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Koenken

Koenken

Crazy Tiger

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Wow. You are good at poems.
The words are so powerful in conveying emotion.

"You should never get between people and their pudding!" - Milly Tompson

  • Sep 24, 2005

Drak

Drak

Dragon Child

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Nice. I really like it.
The way you describe fear is awesome (plus, since most of the poems I've read recently were about love, this is a nice change).
I especially like the way you ended the whole poem.
Seriously a job well-done.

'This is the story about dragons, magic and people dreams' - Dragonblood.
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geninlv1

geninlv1

untamed

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Terrifying! Feels like someone hiding under the covers waiting for something to get them... wait, now how am I supposed to get to sleep?

  • Sep 25, 2005
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I don't want to sound too critical, but i think the rhyming detracts from your poem. While the couplets give it a nice rythym, I think it would be better for you to break the pattern to reflect how terror and fear break the patterns of all our lives.

  • Sep 25, 2005

skysong

skysong

~SMS~

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very awesome poem Kel ^_^ it really describes the feeling of terror well, plus the fact it is usually associated by night and darkness and you are waiting for morning come to escape it..
great job!

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  • Sep 25, 2005

jasaiyajin

jasaiyajin

-repeat-

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Fear of the unknown overwhelming, is that the poem's intent?

We aren't poets playing on a poet's field; we are like the children mingling along the sidelines, dreaming of stepping over and playing the ball game.

Some are content in that aspect, but it's still hard to step over the real line (if it exists).

-repeat-

  • Sep 25, 2005

LucyXlostangelwings

LucyXlostangelwings

Tomorrow's Way~

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A well written poem! It's descriptive and full of imagination. I could just picture the whole scene. Most of all, the rhyming is perfect!
I wonder what the inspiration for this was...

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Anjeile

Anjeile

Dancing In The Storm

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*laughs* i agree with drak. this is a nice change from all the love poems i've seen on mt. a very well written poem. also, like lucyxlostangelwings said, it's descriptive and full of imagination. one can imagine the scene just from your words. incredible! and i also love the rhyming. it's really great. ^^ you've done a great job, my friend. keep it up! ^_^

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  • Sep 30, 2005

Sakura0chan

Sakura0chan

Nihongo o naraitai

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Nice poem. ^^ It shows the feeling of terror very well. ^__^
Keep up the good work! Thanks a lot for sharing this. ;)

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